The First Step in Rebuilding Your Life After a Soul-Crushing Loss: Reconnect with God - Ann Voskamp (2024)

Loss can be a soul-crushing experience, leaving us feeling untethered and adrift. Whether it’s the death of a loved one, an unexpected career change, a miscarriage, or the end of a friendship, each loss creates a void in our hearts. Yet, amidst the grief, there comes a time when we’re called to see the beauty in life again and begin to rebuild. There comes a time when God will call you to create something new for yourself. Today, we welcome Dawn Mann Sanders to the front porch—a fellow “rebuilder” who has navigated profound loss twice and emerged stronger. How do you rebuild when your world falls apart? It starts by letting God restore your power, reconnecting with Him, and trusting that you’re always in His grip. It’s a joy to welcome Dawn to the farm’s table today…

Guest Post by Dawn Mann Sanders

On June 10, 2011, God woke me up the morning after my husband Reggie’s death.

To say his death wasn’t a desired or pleasurable invitation is the understatement of my life.

The loss of my husband equated to the end of the world as I knew it. The last thing I wanted to do that morning was to live in a world without him in it.

When God woke me up that morning, he invited me into what felt like an impossible situation. As far as I was concerned, it simply couldn’t be done. I couldn’t do it. I didn’t want to do it.

My husband had just died and I was powerless to change it.

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In moments of despair, invitations hold immense power. They have the ability to transform lives and shape destinies. How we respond to these invitations determines the course of our journey. They can create the possible and the impossible. That morning, amid my grief, God invited me into the impossible.

In moments of despair, invitations hold immense power. They have the ability to transform lives and shape destinies.”

Reggie was a gifted encourager and supporter. Most importantly for me, he was my champion. When he died, I lost that encouragement and support. I lost my champion—the most tangible part of my support system at the time. It’s no wonder I felt unsupported. It’s no wonder I felt untethered.

Living through the end of the world as you know it often feels as though you’re floating through life untethered. What’s more, you’re floating above a shapeless void—a shadowy abyss.

As we see from Genesis 1:2, hovering or floating untethered is by design. It’s the first step in God’s creative process for rebuilding a life. You feel untethered because you’re no longer tied to the part of your life that just ended, but feeling disconnected from your old life doesn’t mean you have to feel disconnected from God—at least, not for long.

Once I realized I was right where God wanted me to be—untethered from my old life—my struggle began to end.

I didn’t need to be afraid because my position wasn’t untenable. I wasn’t hanging by a thread or cord, as with bungee jumping; I was suspended by and with the Spirit of God. Even though there was an abyss of disorganization, desolation, and darkness as far as my eye could see, I didn’t have to fall into that. I could rest easy. I didn’t have to worry I’d drift away—because God’s Spirit had me. He still has me. I’m in the Spirit’s grip.

Even when I wander, I don’t have to worry. I’m still in one place—his grip. I’m not going very far because God’s got me.

He’s got you too, friend.

I didn’t have to worry I’d drift away—because God’s Spirit had me. He still has me. I’m in the Spirit’s grip.

So it’s safe to reconnect, then remain connected, because God never disconnected. His Spirit had us and His Spirit’s got us.

You see, before God can change our lives, His Spirit must first change us—beginning with our perception. To do this we must break with the past. To succeed at creating a new life, we must first break with our old self and remain poised uncertainly between our old self and new self. Easier said than done? I know.

It took time for me to see my life without Reggie. Watching him fade from my future hurt, so I held on to my image of us together for as long as possible. Unfortunately, this attachment to our shared image caused me to lose touch with God’s plan for my life, because he already saw me and my future differently.

So I wasn’t aligned with God.

I found myself caught between two life visions: my past vision with Reggie and God’s new vision without him. I was torn, unsure which path to follow—yearning to be with Reggie, desiring to be with God, yet not completely separated from nor connected to either.

Remaining close to and resting in God gives us strength to follow, even when torn between our old life and our new one.

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Trusting God by rising above, even when we feel untethered and disconnected, caught uncertainly between two states, is taking the first step in creating our new lives.

It’s abiding so we can “bear much fruit,” even when we want to fall back into the comfort of our previous normal or worse—the abyss. Trusting God by rising above, even when we feel untethered and disconnected, caught uncertainly between two states, is taking the first step in creating our new lives.

To create our new lives, it’s crucial to remain connected to God. Remember: forward movement requires forward thinking—and the quickest way to obtain forward movement is to follow him, not to look back longingly at what we’ve lost.

It’s our delay in trusting him that keeps us from reconnecting – from creating our new lives.

We aren’t powerless. We can choose restoration. We can choose to trust God, then join him in his restoration of us and the rebuilding of our lives and communities.

And when a new life is being created, limbo – the place between endings and beginnings – is where restoration begins.

“…when a new life is being created, limbo – the place between endings and beginnings – is where restoration begins.”

Therefore, the limbo you now find yourself in is your opportunity to reconnect and recharge. It’s where God begins to restore any power you lost – and any peace.

If you’re feeling untethered, if you’re uncertain or torn, if you find yourself waiting, or if your energy levels have dropped, rest easy.

Trust God’s got you and reconnect. Abide and bear much fruit. Remain connected and begin to create your new life.

Adapted from When Your World Ends by Dawn Mann Sanders. ©2024 by Dawn Nicole Sanders. Used by permission of InterVarsity Press. www.ivpress.com.

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Dawn Sanders (MDiv, Bethel Seminary) is an associate minister at First Baptist Church of Glenarden International (FBCGI), where she serves as the director of the sermon-based life groups ministry. Her passion is expository teaching and sharing the wonderful insights God has shown her in his Word. She does this through writing weekly discussion guides for the life groups as well as teaching several in-depth Bible studies. Dawn has written and taught extensively on overcoming adversity and creating a new life, both at FBCG and on her personal blog.

Catastrophic events often feel like the end of the world. When we feel like we have nothing left, we sometimes wish for our own end too. Yet God keeps waking us up every morning—a sign that God wants us to keep living when our world ends. We must find our way to the new life that awaits us on the other side of loss. But how? Dawn Sanders has traveled this path before and lived to tell the tale—not once but twice. After a divorce and then the sudden death of her second husband, Dawn discovered a buried treasure in Genesis 1: God’s process for creating new life out of chaos. In When Your World Ends, Dawn digs deep into the creation story and unearths a seven-step process by which God brings us out of the void and into new beginnings. With her unique perspective, authenticity, and courage, Dawn meets those who are starting over and guides us into renewed hope.

{Our humble thanks to IVPress for their partnership in today’s devotional.}

The First Step in Rebuilding Your Life After a Soul-Crushing Loss: Reconnect with God - Ann Voskamp (2024)

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